Note: This
review was originally posted to my Epinions account.
Adult films are like any other genre. While there are some great titles, you’re
bound to come across a few that stink.
Cyberotica is one such title.
I’ve had this one for a while. I
don’t remember how much I paid, but I hope it wasn’t much.
The ‘plot’, or rather the story used to string
together scenes of naked women, is that a full-emersion sexual experience is
offered by this company. Women can go in
and, by putting on a headset, have a sexual experience. There are basically seven ‘experiences’ as follows:
I. Brunette
gets massaged poolside
II. Another
woman plays with the same guy at a beach
III. Lesbian
scene
IV. Tattooed
woman gets it on with a guy
V. Brunette
on a jet ski
VI. Blonde
gets it on with a guy
VII. Brunette
does a strip show several times by magically changing clothes
I might have enjoyed this except for two
things: bad acting and bad video
quality. There wasn’t much
dialogue. It was mostly a woman sending
customers to a guy that can read newspapers upside down. The guy would then explain the procedure
before plugging the women into the system.
You may have noticed that I didn’t give detailed
explanations. There’s not much to
explain. In the first experience, a
woman gets manhandled…er…massaged for a few minutes. In the fifth scene, it’s a woman riding a jet
ski for way more time that I need to see her ride a jet ski, and I do mean ride
a jet ski.
It looked like the producers didn’t have much
money. It’s not that I expect good
acting or the best video quality, but I’d like someone that can do better than
the typical bad-acting choppy delivery.
I’d also like something that looks like it wasn’t filmed on a used VHS
tape.
This was the Collectors Edition, which meant some
bonus scenes (not really saying much) and had some trailers, which I didn’t
bother with. The movie was 55 minutes,
most of which I skipped over. Some of
the women were attractive, but some weren’t.
I’ll admit that it was a matter of preference. You’ll probably find different women
attractive.
I suppose it’s like they say: No one is a complete waste, as they can at
least serve as an example of what not to do.
This is one of those movies that I’d avoid watching if you’re interested
in watching an adult film. If you’re
interested in making one and want to see what low production values will get
you, this is what you should watch, at least to understand why you should be
prepared to spend some money to make your movie.
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